Christmas is my favorite time of the year. Do you remember being a child during the holiday season? It was magical. People were kinder, a palpable joy danced on the air throughout the town, and anything seemed possible—if you believed. As we age, that magic seems to fade. But why should magic be reserved only for children?
A few years ago, I decided to bring the magic back into my life. In order to regain the Christmas spirit, I knew I needed to remove as much holiday stress as possible. For me, the biggest stressor was preparing traditional holiday meals.
There was a time when women would gather in the kitchen to cook. They would come together to share the work while bonding over lively discussions. For many of us, that tradition has changed. For example, I cook alone in my kitchen for the holidays.
While I love cooking for my family and am filled with nostalgia while preparing traditional holiday foods, I also recognize a trade-off: I can either spend hours alone in the kitchen preparing a meal that will be consumed in less than an hour, or I can spend that time creating hours of memories with my family.
However, I felt obligated to spend those hours in the kitchen making traditional holiday foods—just like my mother did and her mother did before her. I was afraid that deviating from that expectation would disappoint my family. And I felt selfish for thinking of my own needs instead of theirs.
So, I sat down with my family and shared my feelings—and proposed a happy medium.
Between planning the meal, procuring the ingredients, and cooking in the kitchen for hours, my holidays were centered around food. But once the meal was served, I was usually too tired to enjoy the food with my family, let alone clean up the kitchen. I decided that I didn’t want my holiday memories filled with images of me cooking alone in the kitchen while my family was in the next room laughing and playing board games without me. I didn’t want to continue missing out on the magic simply because I was too busy and too tired.
So, I decided to change our family holiday tradition by making food a side dish instead of a centerpiece. Much to my surprise, my family loved the idea. Together, we created stress-free, simple holiday gatherings. Here are some ways in which my family has recaptured the magic of the season:
Grazing gatherings also eliminate the stress of having to time a meal based on the arrival of the guests. What if someone is late? It doesn’t matter with grazing gatherings. For example, if you add the potluck aspect, whenever the guests arrive, they simply place their dish on the buffet table. With grazing gatherings, you can eliminate the stress of timing the meal and reduce your time in the kitchen.
Once we changed our approach to the holidays, the magic of the Christmas season returned. Now, my holiday memories are filled with images of my children smiling as we play board games together, the sound of their laughter as I chase them around the house playing tag, the warmth of my husband’s arms wrapped around me as we sit on the couch and enjoy the stillness, and the joy in my heart that comes from allowing myself to slow down and live in the moment.
If you give yourself the freedom to reshape your holiday traditions, simplified gatherings could be the key to recreating the magical Christmas season you knew and loved as a child.
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