There are days that feel hard. Not necessarily because stuff is out of whack or not working out. Everything is as it should be, but still, it feels hard.
It feels as if pieces are missing or just aren’t fitting. It feels as if there isn’t enough and never will be enough. Yesterday was one of those days for me. Yesterday was a day of a lot of feelings. Mostly familiar. Tears burned at the corner of my eyes as I kept thinking about how things were and how I wished they could be and all the ways they weren’t what I felt they should be. Discontentment and discouragement stood ready to receive me. It was easy to follow them. To get comfortable and run the gamut of woulda-shoulda-coulda. To be honest, I kind of went there a little bit. It’s easy to do. It’s easy to make myself at home in a space full of questioning, doubting, and worrying even though it’s not where I want to be.
