The last month or so has been more than a little hectic around here.
Actually, if I can be honest with you, the last year has pretty much been hustle and crash on repeat. Nothing I can’t handle, of course, but just challenging in a myriad of ways.
Between my ongoing medical issues, moving across the country, planning a wedding, traveling, adjusting my entire family to a new location and routine–well, let’s just say it’s been more than a little crazy and I’ve been more than a little stressed. I typically deal with stress appropriately, having several strategies in place, but my lifestyle has certainly taken a hit as my stress threshold reaches it’s limit.
There have been a few times that I began to crack. Not completely. Just a few cracks here and there. And within those cracks I’ve found myself living out of balance, further from my center than I ever prefer to be.
In fact, over the last few weeks I’ve experienced so many cracks that I’m lucky to have simply done the bare minimum in all aspects of my life. As a recovering perfectionist, it’s often difficult to accept the bare miminum. But when I realign with my purpose and bring myself back to center, I realize it’s okay.The minimum is okay.
What it comes down to is this: Every now and then, I place unnecessary pressure to myself to be better than my best.
You guys know how I feel about your “best.” Your best is not anyone else’s best; it doesn’t hinge on the actions or successes of others. Your best is different every single day; it’s the faith and acceptance of knowing that right now you are doing the best you can, and that tomorrow your best might involve more or less effort.
Your best is what you can give at any moment, without causing harm to yourself or others. You simply can’t be better than your best, and you should be wary of those who attempt to convince you to do so–especially if that person happens to be you.
There are times during my journey when I think I need to do better than my best. When this happens I simply become a aware of the feeling–no judgment, no shame, no beating myself up. I’m not ashamed to admit this to you, because at this stage in my life, I’m just not ashamed of anything.
Everything is an opportunity to learn, to grow, to evolve. I will sometimes feel stress, envy, jealousy, anxiety, and fear. I will sometimes revert to old habits and begin to think: “What if it’s not enough? What if I need to be more?”
I know it’s a trap. I know it won’t serve me. I know that I’m always doing my best, and sometimes my best is the bare minimum.
The way I see it, if my dogs and children are fed, coffee is brewed, dishes are (mostly) done, emails are (mostly) answered, I move a little bit, and everyone knows I love them–I’m doing alright. I might only manage a 15-20 minute workout and wind up eating the most random concoction of food from the fridge, but that’s all completely okay. In fact, it’s more than okay.
In order to be truly and sustainably successful and content, I’ve given myself explicit permission to sometimes just do the bare minimum, which consists of my daily “non-negotiables.” When it comes to my daily non-negotiables, the list is pretty short (obviously this includes unlisted things like getting out of bed, brushing my teeth, and so on).
