PG-13 | 1h 58m | Drama, Comedy, Mystery, Crime | 2025
For the most part, murder mysteries fall into one of two sub-categories. There’s the relatively toned-down, Agatha Christie / “Murder She Wrote” variety and the much harsher, grisly, “Se7en” / “The Silence of the Lambs” version. The new Netflix release “The Thursday Murder Club” (“Thursday”) fits neatly into the first camp.
The great thing about these diametrically-opposed approaches is that each has its own dedicated fanbase and rarely do the ‘twain ever meet. To my recollection, the only instance where the twain has met is with director Rian Johnson’s two (soon to be three) “Knives Out” productions.
The best thing about “Thursday” is that it knows what it wants to do and more than accomplishes its goal. The movie’s most unimpressive feat is that it features four highly accomplished performers and calls on them to appear in one of the lightest of lightweight screenplays of their collective careers.
22 Awards Notwithstanding
Since 1982, the four co-leads (Helen Mirren, Pierce Brosnan, Ben Kingsley, and Celia Imrie) have received 22 major entertainment awards from eight different organizations. All of them have been bestowed with their birth country’s highest possible civilian honor. The point here is that this isn’t a quartet of has-been’s or never-were’s, but rather four very talented, well-respected thespians.Based on the first of what will soon be a series of five novels by British TV presenter Richard Osman, “Thursday” is set in Kent, a county in southeast England. This is where the fictional Cooper’s Chase retirement community is located. If I was a British subject and had money to burn, I’d live there in a heartbeat. It’s not a community of modest bungalows but rather, a centuries-old castle; this ornately appointed castle looks a great deal like the ginormous title building in “Downton Abbey.”
The title club includes former spy and still-married Elizabeth (Mirren), retired psychiatrist and lifelong bachelor Ibrahim (Kingsley), the twice-divorced former u
nion delegate Ron (Brosnan), and newest member, the widow Joyce (Imrie), a retired nurse.
British Keystone Kops
The local police, one step removed from the Keystone Kops, haven’t a clue as to what to do next. Should they cave into the club’s request that will allow recent transfer, officer Donna de Freitas (Naomi Ackie), to assist them? I’m not well-versed in the ways of English law enforcement, but I’m pretty sure a government-paid police officer is not available to be “farmed out” to a band of doggedly determined senior citizens with way too much free time on their hands.
When not tossing about improbable and impractical subplots, co-writers Katy Brand and Suzanne Heathcote manage to work in two semi-sly references to previous characters previously played by Mirren. Making her character an ex-spy is a direct reference to “RED” (2010). The two characters’ haircuts are exactly the same.
Relentless Score
Clocking in at two hours long, the movie is easily 30 minutes too long, something made all the worse by a relentless, unrelenting score by Thomas Newman and the delayed reveal of the murderer. Without giving anything away, it’s a character never hinted at. Worse, it’s one who doesn’t in any way pay for their crimes.All of this is par for the course for Chris Columbus, a guy who has now directed 17 features, only two of which are remotely recommendable (“Home Alone” and “Mrs. Doubtfire”).
Given that there are three, likely four more books in the series, the chances of more “Thursday” movies is highly likely.
As stated, the movie knew what it wanted to do and it accomplished its goal. I stand by this statement. It wanted to do the least amount possible with the least amount of original thought, and it succeeded in doing so.
In order to exceed or meet low expectations, all one needs to do is to keep the bar way low and aim just slightly above ground level. “Thursday” does so perfectly, as designed.
