Eagerly awaiting the birth of her second son after a traumatic first birth experience, a Utah mom made sure her family was prepared, including her then-3-year-old son. Yet when labor got almost too intense to bear, nothing could have helped her more than the sweet, calming words from her son that made her pull through.
Idaho-born Delaina Leigh Compton, 27, endured an asynclitic birth with her first son when he shifted position so his head was tilted to one side. Delaina gave birth to Leo, now 4, amid the dissolution of her marriage to her first husband, and claims she wasn’t at her healthiest “mentally, emotionally, or physically.”
However, Delaina, who’s a professional dancer found love again and married David, 30. Delaina fell pregnant unexpectedly with her second child.
“We had planned on having another child, we were excited for it, but it came a lot sooner than planned,” Delaina said. “I was still healing from past trauma and abuse from previous relationships.”
It wasn’t until her third trimester that Delaina started to feel a lot better about her pregnancy.
Delaina chose Utah Birth Suites birthing center to have her baby—describing it as “in-between hospital and home”—with the support of her husband. She did a lot of research and educated herself on unmedicated birth, and the benefits of having a home birth or going into a birthing center, and made a birth plan to help her feel in control.
She also made sure to prepare her son, toddler Leo, for the experience ahead.
“I would watch a birth video and make sure that it was age-appropriate for him, then I would show it and tell him, ‘This is when Mama’s going to be in labor, this is when the baby’s gonna be pushed out, this is the placenta,’” said Delaina. “He loved it, he thought it was the coolest thing.”
Delaina said she also taught Leo that there were going to be times when he would have to watch her use lion strength to “roar out the baby,” and that if there was any time that she was going to be loud it was because she was using her lion power.
The then-expectant mom went into labor in December 2021 on schedule, at home. Everything seemed normal until she felt a “shift,” and an intense pelvic pain that she knew instantly wasn’t normal. This made her “nervous” and “fearful,” because her baby had previously been in the optimal position for birth. Delaina had no idea then that he had become asynclitic.
The midwife and doula were nervous that Delaina was in transition, the final part of labor before a woman starts to push.
Sensing his mom’s fear and pain, little Leo stepped in to say: “Take deep breaths, Mama. Remember, this pain is a good pain!”
“Hearing him saying that was just exactly what I needed,” said Delaina. “I had no idea how well he'd grasped onto these different things that I taught him ... I really feel, because of everything he has gone through at such a young age, it’s made him a very tender, smart young boy.”
It was incredible for Delaina as she witnessed her son being so sweet.
Leo—whose full name is Leonidas, meaning “lion strength”—accompanied his mom and father to the birthing center where Delaina got into a tub to help with labor pains. She got out when it was time to push, to try different positions. That’s when her midwife found out that Delaina’s cervix was acting like a rubber band around the baby’s head.
The baby was stuck, and with his head tilted, he was descending at an angle. Unlike other babies, whose heart rates may drop in distress as their mothers push, Delaina’s baby’s heart rate was dropping when she was not pushing. However, she was determined to have the baby, and thus tried almost everything she could to get him out.
“I was in a lot more pain than I knew I should be,” Delaina recalled. “Everything about pushing him and getting him out was more intense than it should be.”
Delaina’s midwife also manually held back her cervix to help the baby descend into the birth canal.
After an hour of pushing, baby Luca was born in a little shock, but healthy, weighing 7 pounds 4 ounces (approx. 3.3 kg). Leo helped David cut the cord before the family of four cuddled up for skin-to-skin bonding time.
Needless to say, Leo was smitten seeing his baby brother.
“During the labor, he kept saying, ‘Oh, I’m so excited to meet the baby boy!’ Then once the baby came, he was just so enamored. There was light in his eyes, it was tangible,” said Delaina, whose sister-in-law told her that the birth “didn’t even faze” big brother Leo.
Delaina and David were emotional, knowing how intense the delivery had been.
“My husband was crying because he was there with me through the entire labor and birth and seeing how hard it was. And there are points where he was also fearful,” Delaina said. “I never knew, because he never voiced or showed that.”
Once Luca was there with the family, it was such a relief for them. From the very beginning, there was a very “sweet, special spirit about him, so it was magical to say the least,” she said of the newborn.
Delaina said that her husband, midwife, and doula were “game-changers,” and the skill of her hand-picked birthing team allowed them to handle complications without transferring to a hospital.
“Doctors will typically intervene with either drugs or different methods to get the labor going. Those are interventions that typically will cause a cascade of interventions,” she reflected.
She explained that, usually, one intervention will cause a reaction, and another intervention has to come in to help that reaction, and this is what she experienced during her birth with Leo. This time, with Luca, it was like a night-and-day difference, she said, describing the experience as “amazing.”
Delaina first met David, who is now her “rock,” on a dating app in 2014, while living in Salt Lake City, Utah. She was still wrestling her way out of a “toxic relationship” at the time, so David became her friend and protector. Although they did have feelings for each other at that time, Delaina said the timing didn’t seem to be right.
Both of them moved on and married different people. With both of them divorced from their partners, they began to spend a lot of time with each other as friends and realized that they wanted similar things in life, thus they began dating. For Leo, the transition was easy, said Delaina, as he already knew that David was a really good friend of his mom.
“Coming into this marriage, it is just so different,” she reflected. “We’re equal partners ... we just do whatever we can do to help each other, which is incredible, and how I think it should be.”
As Luca approaches 5 months old, the family of four is “getting into the groove of things.” David works from home and provides invaluable support. Delaina adores being a mom of two, and the family finds their joy in the great outdoors, hiking, and exploring national parks together.
Meanwhile, Leo and Luca’s adorable growing bond has been an icing on the cake for the family.
“From the very beginning, he’s like, ‘I’m going to be the best big brother ever, I’m going to teach him all of these things!’” Delaina said. “Even though Luca can’t play much right now, Leo is still finding ways to meet him where he’s at and play with him in that way. He’s constantly trying to love on him, give him hugs and kisses, and it’s incredible.”
“It’s so cool to me, watching them become who I feel they’re meant to be, and who God has created them to be,” she said, adding, “I have so many different hats in life ... but at the end of the day, I really feel like my role as a mother is the single most important role that I will ever have.”
As her children grow, Delaina’s parenting philosophy is to always lead with optimism and ensure her children know how fiercely they are loved. Mistakes help them learn and grow, and open, honest communication is paramount.
“It’s all about helping each other become the best version of ourselves, and helping each other reach our goals and chase after our dreams,” she said. “It’s crucial for my kids to feel safe in expressing their emotions and thoughts with us, and for us as parents to help them navigate them in a healthy way.”
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