Mom Pays Thanks to Ex’s New Partner for Helping Raise Her Daughter in Viral Facebook Post

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“Breaking up is hard to do,” as the old song goes. This is especially true when a couple’s split involves kids. But one divorced mom, Brittney Johnson, from Columbia, Missouri, has made headlines with her viral Facebook post praising her ex-husband’s new partner.

The remarkable note of appreciation from one woman to another has earned lots of positive comments from those who are impressed at this example of co-parenting. As this open-minded mom wrote, her daughter “has more people to love her this way, and what more could a mother ever want for her child?”

Blended families can be difficult to make work. As Judith Wallerstein, a psychologist specializing in divorce found in her long-term studies, most children of blended families feel “the lack of a template, a working model, for a loving relationship between a man and a woman.”

Seeing conflict between biological parents before divorce and then between co-parents afterward can be extremely damaging for young children. This is exactly what Brittney Johnson wanted to avoid after she split up with her husband Charles Swarzentruber. Though the two were no longer together, they agreed to continue to co-parent their young daughter Payton no matter what happened.

“I prayed one night for the type of woman my daughter’s father would be with, knowing that she would be raised in two homes,” Johnson wrote in her post. She was naturally uneasy at first when the father of her child started dating another woman, Kayla Imhoff, but decided to give her a chance.

“I wondered if Payton would like Kayla more than she likes me,” Johnson told US Weekly. “But that feeling went away pretty quickly when I learned that she wasn’t trying to take my place, but create her own place with Payton. We have never been in competition with each other.”

After quickly getting past her own misapprehensions, Johnson came to appreciate the stability and support that Imhoff helped bring to her daughter’s life. As she told Babble, she tried putting herself in Imhoff’s shoes. “Being in a relationship with someone who has a child can be daunting; knowing that things can get complicated,” she said. “I think it takes a special person to decide to stick around anyway.”

When Imhoff started nursing school, she bought Payton a pair of tiny-size scrubs to match her own. This helped cement the relationship between stepmom and stepdaughter. Johnson especially appreciated the way that Imhoff was a good example at her ex-husband’s home.

As Johnson wrote, “thank you Kayla [Imhoff] for showing Payton how to chase her dreams, how to work hard and stay up late to study for a test. Thank you for still making time to ride her bike with her and make her mac and cheese even in one of the stressful times of your life.”

Once Johnson realized that she could trust Imhoff, she began to see her co-parent as an asset rather than a liability. “My child is my world, and when I realized that Kayla’s interest was to treat Payton as her own, it was actually a huge relief for me,” she told Babble.

Imhoff also appreciates how Johnson has let her in to the family, telling ABC News, “I appreciate that [Brittney] appreciates me so much. She doesn’t have to do that and she does. That’s what makes our relationship so special.” Johnson and Imhoff talk all the time as they coordinate their busy schedules to spend as much quality time as possible with Payton.

Dad Charles Swarzentruber is a mechanic who works long hours and appreciates his ex-wife’s coordination with his new partner. “I’m just glad that these two get along and love my little girl the way they do,” he told ABC. “They help me a lot. That’s for sure.”

Making sure everything runs smoothly requires a lot of planning. “We agree on discipline and school and holiday schedules before we even introduce it to Payton,” Johnson told Babble. “Being consistent and working together makes for such a great transition between homes.”

Her advice to co-parents in blended family situations? “If you’re co-parenting, and seeing your child [enjoying time with their step-parent] doesn’t bring a smile to your face, reconsider what’s truly best for your child.” After all, as Johnson reminds herself constantly, “Payton has more people to love her this way, and what more could a mother ever want for her child?”

The response to Johnson’s magnanimous post was impressive, with over 155,000 likes to date and has been shared and commented on thousands of times by others who are in a similar situation.

Since the viral post, Johnson has continued to devote herself to having a good working relationship with Imhoff and her ex-partner Swarzentruber. When Johnson’s headlight went out on her car one evening, her ex stepped up to fix it for her. After the end of a long working day, this grateful mom had to appreciate the gesture on Facebook.

“Thank you Charles for being a dad who shows up, who is always cheering [Payton] on and lifting her up and encouraging her ornery. And thank you for being the dad who shows her how we help each other.” As she noted, parents often tell their kids how to behave and do the right thing.

“Until you’re walking in those shoes and showing them day in and day out the right way to treat people, you’re just wasting your breath,” she added. “Our girl is sure blessed to have three parents who are willing to walk the walk with her, together.”

Despite the difficult situation, Johnson is ultimately convinced that everyone is doing what is best for her daughter, and that’s all that matters. As she told ABC, “we’re on Payton’s team.”