A number of years ago, a friend of mine organized a Christmas charity event. Like many of its kind, this event matched less fortunate children with well-off families, eager to share of their bounty and provide the children with a present or two at a fun Christmas party.
But the gift giving didn’t stay limited to one or two items. Many of the givers got so excited by the prospect that they lavished their assigned children with gifts of all kinds. Such gestures were very kind and expressed the joy of giving ... but suddenly things began to backfire.
Faced with an abundance of gifts, the children became grumpy and demanding. The joy that was first present turned sour and the party turned into an entitlement pity fest with kids crying and throwing tantrums. Those of us who witnessed it were shocked and horrified. What was happening and where had things gone wrong?!
I thought of this experience when a friend shared a story by author Kris Vallotton. As Vallotton explains, Christmas in his family had always been a meager affair out of necessity. As time passed, however, finances grew and more abundance was possible. Because of this, Vallotton and his wife decided to give their grandkids a Christmas they would always remember:
“That year, each of our children and grandchildren gave Kathy a ‘Christmas want list,’ as has been our tradition for more than three decades. But unlike most years, where Kathy would sift through the list and choose a few things for each person, she instead decided to get them everything on all their lists. By the time Christmas Day arrived, the tree had literally disappeared beneath the gifts that were stacked to the ceiling, not to mention another pile of presents nearly as big downstairs.”
Vallotton goes on to say that he, his wife, their children, and grandchildren all had the time of their lives, until one child dissolved into pouting tears and was sent to another room to bring about an attitude adjustment. Vallotton explains the reason:
