Haini Wolfgramm, of the famous music band The Jets, and his wife, Sarah, always wanted to have a big family. Today, the couple, who themselves grew up in huge families, feel humbled that God has blessed them with “amazing and beautiful” children and together they hope to raise them as strong and confident future leaders.
“God loves each of His children the same, even though they are immensely diverse. I have a small glimpse into that kind of love with so many children that are all different,” Sarah told The Epoch Times.
A singer-songwriter and catering company owner, Sarah, 47, is one of nine siblings and her family history goes back to the first pilgrims that came to America on the Mayflower. While Haini, 55, is one of 17 siblings and says his huge Polynesian-Tongan family emigrated to the United States in 1965. Haini and his siblings later formed the family band, The Jets, who rose to fame in the 1980s and worked with celebrities like Prince, Morris Day, Jimmy Jam, and Terry Lewis, producing hits like “Crush on You,“ ”Cross My Broken Heart,“ and ”You Got It All.”
The couple’s seven oldest children have continued the family legacy by forming their own band, 13 Crowns.
A Larger Capacity to Love
Haini met Sarah when their bands went on tour together and the couple fell in love. They went on to marry and raise a family in Redlands, California, welcoming 14 children in 21 years.Sarah, who always loved babies growing up, said: "In high school, I was voted ’most likely to have 20 kids.' I love that I have this huge community of cousins, aunts, uncles, and siblings who love and support me in this life. I wanted to give that to my own children.
“I feel humbled and blessed that God has trusted them all to our care.”
Sarah and Haini’s children are: Eve, 26, Heinrich, 25, Isabella, 23, Tihane, 22, Abraham, 20, Maikeli, 19, Nora, 17, Hazel, 16, Wesley, 14, Mary, 12, Vake, 10, Lynnae, 7, and Joy, 5.
The couple’s twelfth baby born, Sariah, would be 8 today. Tragically, Sariah passed away from SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome) at 3 months old.
One evening, Haini rocked Sariah to sleep before joining the rest of his family for an evening prayer. When he returned to the bedroom a short time later, Sariah was not breathing.
“She had peacefully slipped away in her sleep,” Sarah said. “We were devastated; how could she be here one moment and gone in an instant?
“We prayed and clung to our loved ones and sought out answers as to why God would take her. We exercised our faith, which then grew stronger. Answers came to our hearts and we have come to realize that her time here was a gift. She was needed elsewhere.”
Sarah, Haini, and their kids grieved deeply but decided that their family’s story mustn’t end on a tragic note. Sarah placed her faith in God to give her the strength to carry another child and shortly became pregnant again.
“Lynnae was the rainbow baby we needed to pour our love over and fill a hole in our hearts,” Sarah said, adding, “Two years later, we were totally shocked to have another bonus baby, with Joy. She’s the caboose of our big crazy family!”
Cultivating Patience
Sarah and Haini’s family has embraced the chaos that comes with having 16 people under one roof. Nonetheless, Sarah, who has homeschooled all their children, keeps a daily to-do list and roster in which everyone helps out.“You lower your expectations,” she said. “Honestly, I have come to terms with the fact that there aren’t many women out there with as much on their plate as I have, so if my laundry isn’t done and folded daily, that’s okay; if my walls have handprints, that’s okay too. We will get to it eventually!”
Haini said: “We both love the fun, crazy, and busy atmosphere of a home that is always alive with something going on. I think the more challenging things we face are keeping a sense of order in the home with chores, homeschool, scheduling, communication, making sure that each child’s voice is being heard, and tending to their individual needs, which are all different.”
Sarah claims the core of their loving, functional family is “unity, flexibility, service, respect, love, and faith.” She also advocates for any parents of multiple children to “grow a lot of patience.”
“You will need it when waiting for the bathroom, when kids have spilled red Gatorade on the carpet, when one kid refuses to wear the outfits that match for the family photo,” she said, advising, “Just let the little things go because when the real hard stuff comes, you’ll crumble under the weight of it if you haven’t gained patience.”
Despite the odd squabble, one thing the 14 Wolfgramm siblings do not struggle with is getting along. The oldest seven—Eve, Heinrich, Isabella, Tihané, Abraham, Maikeli, and Nora—have even entered the music business together as 13 Crowns and their band has a growing fanbase with its catchy original songs.
Baby Joy came along after Sarah had already patented the band name, 13 Crowns, so Joy became the family’s “halo.”
A Safe Home
For Sarah, her children are her greatest accomplishment and she says people are “genuinely fascinated” by their huge family where love abounds. The couple hopes they are raising confident children and strong leaders who will spread positive influence in the world, and be happy in whatever they do.“After I’m gone from this earth in 50 years, no one’s going to remember my clothes, or how my house was decorated, or how I paid my electricity bill but they will remember the lives that were created, and characters that were crafted and molded into people who hopefully carry on the legacy of a strong, loving family that can weather the storms of life,” she said.
Reflecting on faith, the proud mom said, “In a world where religious beliefs and faith in a supreme being are dwindling, I think it forces me to hold to my faith even stronger.”
