A young mom received a barrage of insults after asking for ideas on what to prepare for her partner’s lunch. Maddie, from Sydney, posted on North Shore Mums‘ private Facebook page; sandwiches had become passé in Maddies’ household so she wanted a helping hand.
As she hits back saying 'when did it become a crime to look after your man?'
“I would love to hear what other mums make their hubbies for lunch and snacks throughout the work day,” Maddie wrote to the closed group of 26,186 members, according to The Sun. But that day, her luck was out. Instead of Maddie receiving helpful advice, an army of angry women scorned her for being a “slave.”
“Hubby is a grown man,” one North Shore mom contributed. “I already do his laundry and keep his children alive. Our advice is to stop making his lunches!”
“I was married for twenty years,” began another put-out parent, “and my favourite packed lunch for my husband was called a ‘Get it Yourself’ with a side order of ‘I’m not your mother,'” she wrote.
One group member attempted to cast a critical eye over Maddie’s message. “I think this post could have gone a totally different way if the word ‘Hubbie’ wasn’t used,” they ventured. “No need to mention who the lunch is for, because that shouldn’t really be relevant.”
A lot people are NOT impressed – but what do you think?
The Daily Telegraph claimed that the ringleader was in fact Polly Dunning, daughter of the professional feminist Jane Caro. Dunning is famous for having once disparaged her own pregnancy by saying, “I felt sick at the thought of something male growing inside me.”
Dunning posted: “You should pack him nothing for lunch. And you didn’t really ask for advice,” she continued, “you asked what other ‘mums’ pack their ‘hubbies’ (which, to me, is slightly weird phrasing, but whatever).”
Maddie was shocked and hurt, but to her credit, she hit back at the bullies. “I’m actually so devastated about some of these comments,” she began.
“Thank you so much, ladies who did reply with helpful tips and advice,” Maddie continued. “To the rest of you, you should be ashamed of yourselves.” According to the Daily Telegraph, Maddie and her husband were saving up to buy their first home, and money was tight.
“You have no idea what my husband does,” the young mom explained. “He cooks dinner every second night when I’m putting Bub to bed. He gets up in the middle of the night with our Bub.”
“He is a champion.”
Dunning responded. “We are not, any of us, just mums,” she shared frankly. “‘Mum’ is one of the many roles we have as women, and a role that certainly does not include doing anything for our partners, because we’re not his (or her) mother.”
Facebook moderators took a cue from Maddie and promptly deleted some of the most hurtful comments. As an antidote to the whirlwind of rage, several moms then stepped up to speak in Maddie’s defence.
“I work and so does my husband, and I love making his lunch,” contributed one group member. “We have been married 12 years and it is a nice way to let him know I care for him.”
Another posted: “I think it’s a very lovely and kind gesture, though acknowledge that not everyone may have the time and capacity to do so. Surely nice actions like these get reciprocated in happy marriages.”
Realistically, none of us are equipped with the knowledge to judge each other as parents and partners. Give and take may well be the secret to a long and happy marriage.
Even if it means a woman making lunch for her “hubby” from time to time!