For Thanksgiving dinner, it’s not just the meal that needs to be prepared—you have to be prepared. Being prepared counts most when you´re in a more formal setting than you’re used to—maybe at grandmama’s or hosting your strict mother-in-law. That means no eating off each other’s plates and belts are supposed to stay tighten. If you’re at a total loss when it comes to to the finer points of etiquette and feel stressful already, don’t panic. It is not so complicated, just read these tips for table manners. Because even when everything else is prepared as you wish, there are still ways to ruin a perfect meal. Remember, good manners never go out of style.
Setting the table
Starting with table setting, I guess everybody is familiar with order of plates and utensils.“Bread and butter” set up always go to the left and drink to the right, right? But did you know, that knife blades always face the plate and the napkin goes to the left or on the plate? If you see more knives, spoons, or even forks besides your plate, simply use them starting from the outside and work your way in.
Starting the meal
Speaking about napkins, don’t be afraid to place it on your lap right when you take your seat and also feel free to tuck it into your collar when you think the meal requires it. After you are finished, just place it to the left of your fork.
The meal begins when your host or hostess picks up their fork to eat. Do not start before this unless the host or hostess insists you start eating.
Also, don’t forget about your posture. You don’t need to be stiff, but a definite “do not” is hunching your shoulder over the plate. Putting elbows on the table is well-known dining etiquette taboo, but it relates just to the time of eating. It is completely acceptable during a mealtime conversation—it shows your interest.
During the meal
To pass food at the table, it is recommended to do it counterclockwise (to the right). Of course, there is no need to go to extremes, as extremes aren’t good either. If a person on your left asks for a dish, don’t pass it all the way around the table.
One interesting table manner relates to passing salt and pepper, which should always be passed together. Even if someone asks just for one of them, give them both. But be sure to taste the food before putting salt or pepper on it. The last thing you want is a displeased host because you ruined the meal.
When cutting your food, make only one or two bite-sized pieces at a time, since cut-up food gets colder faster and it is not very attractive. The exception to the rule, of course, is when helping a young child.
Although drinking while eating helps to consume, try to avoid doing it with a full mouth.
When leaving the table to go to the restroom, it is alright to just say “Excuse me” or “I'll be right back,” you don’t have to be explicit.
If you are slow eater, try to think on others first and speed up a bit on this festive occasion, even if the meal is your favorite one. Try not to be left as the only one eating. That will hold everyone up. If you are usually a faster eater, pace your eating so that you don’t finish before the others are barely underway.
Finishing the meal
When you want to be completely proper even after the meal is finished, place your knife and fork parallel on the rim of the plate with the handles at four o'clock position (remember, just one hour before your “tea at five”). The blade of your knife should face inward.
Now is time to thank your host and, as Thanksgiving dinner will probably be informal one, feel free to offer your help with cleaning the table.
Last but not least, a tip for guests at Thanksgiving dinner: don’t be late. Your host has timed everything perfectly. A gift for the hostess is not required, but it’s always thoughtful to bring something for the person hosting an event at their home, especially if you’re not bringing food, bring wine or another contribution to the meal.
