Becoming Parents
Their story began several years ago when Lilley and her husband became volunteers with Childhelp, a nonprofit dedicated to supporting abused, neglected, and at-risk youth. This experience inspired them to become passionate advocates for foster children. “My husband and I just really have a heart for children who are marginalized and overlooked. … That’s why we became foster parents,” Lilley explained. In 2016, they welcomed a 4-month-old boy, Kayden, into their home.Fostering Kayden was not initially about adoption. “The goal of foster care nationwide is reunification with the family,” Lilley emphasized. “The goal … is never adoption.” The court system gave Kayden’s biological parents every opportunity to reunify, but they were unable to do so. His biological mother, who had also lived in the foster care system, faced challenges that reflected the difficult cycle many families struggle to break. “It’s a cycle, and it’s a really hard cycle to break,” Lilley noted in an interview with “Good Morning America.” In June 2019, Lilley and her husband joyfully adopted Kayden, who was 3 years old.
While awaiting adoption, Kayden’s younger half brother, Jeffrey, had also entered the foster care system. Placed with another family for about a month, Lilley and her husband worked expeditiously to bring him to their home, determined to keep the brothers together. With Jeffrey, she said, “Adoption was more the goal from the get-go,” noting that the boys’ biological mother also supported the move. After navigating the complex foster care process—“You can’t just streamline it to adoption; you still have to go through the process,”—they finalized Jeffrey’s adoption in 2020, when he was about 2-½ years old. Lilley celebrated this milestone in a video titled, “We’ve officially adopted!”
By the time Jeffrey was in their care and Kayden’s case was moving toward adoption, the couple knew they would be parents for life. Confident in that calling, they also decided to grow their family biologically. Just one month after Kayden’s adoption, Lilley gave birth to their first daughter, Julie. The couple had consciously planned for a girl, experimenting with the Shettles method of child conception to increase their chances. Lilley recalled with a laugh, “I turned to my husband one night and said, ‘All right, so if we do this right now, we have a chance of having a girl. Otherwise, for the next [few] months, … we’re in the boy window.’ So that’s how Julie was conceived.” Julie’s arrival was pure fun—but with three under three, life was also wonderfully chaotic. “It was nuts,” Lilley admitted.
Less than two years later, Lilley gave birth to their second biological daughter, Jackie, in a dramatic and unexpected delivery that occurred just seven minutes after arriving at the emergency room. In a self-described “vulnerable” Instagram post, Lilley admitted she was “still processing” the pregnancy right up until the birth, having hoped to grow their family through foster care again. “Jackie was a really fun surprise and just happened to be a girl,” she said. Jackie’s arrival completed their family of four children.Lilley clarified some misconceptions about their foster journey: “Some people assumed we turned to foster care because I couldn’t become pregnant,” she said, while acknowledging the real struggles of infertility for others. “But that simply wasn’t part of our story.” Instead, she reiterated that their path was driven by a calling to support foster youth, a mission that still inspires their lives today.
Rooted in Faith
A common thread running through Lilley’s acting, activism, writing, and philanthropy is her deeply rooted Christian faith, which she describes as the cornerstone of her life’s purpose. “My faith informs everything I do,” she explained, “from how I love people to how I see myself.” She manifests this perspective in her new book, “Wake Up Your Faith,” a daily devotional set for release in November 2025, which takes readers on a journey of spiritual renewal.
Lilley focuses on Isaiah 6:8, “Here I am; send me,” observing that Christians sometimes “overcomplicate” their faith and think of “ministry” as a grand gesture, like being an overseas missionary. “We think it has to be this pivotal moment,” she said, “but [oftentimes] God has already placed us where we are for a purpose.” She said the idea of personal ministry can be simplified when we see it as “showing up in everyday life with the love of Jesus. So whether you’re at work, in a grocery store, or in the school pickup line, it’s just choosing to see people through heaven’s lens,” Lilley explained, a perspective she said makes others feel seen, valued, and cared for in the moment.
Through ‘Heaven’s Lens’
Beyond her advocacy, Lilley connects with fans through her many holiday films, as she shared in an interview last year when discussing Christmas Con, a fan convention in Edison, New Jersey, that brings together enthusiasts of holiday movies. While Christmas is a warm, wonderful time of year, Lilley noted it’s also filled with heartache for many: “The reality is there are people that have lost loved ones that have to face Christmas for the very first time; so when they say that my movie was the only time they didn’t cry for 90 minutes—that means more to me than winning a massive award.” Referring to her work in films, Lilley added, “I just love that I can minister to someone in their own living room and give them reprieve.”In light of this, Lilley’s role as Gloria Stewart in the upcoming movie “Jimmy,” set for release in 2026, feels like a divine alignment of her faith and talents. Lilley choked up when asked about her role in the film: “It’s celebrating a true hero to our country. … I think that it’s going to be exactly what our nation needs to see.”
From her advocacy for foster youth to inspiring film roles, Jen Lilley embodies her call to “see people through heaven’s lens”—even as she encourages the rest of us to do the same.
