A Proverb of Balance: ‘The Grass Is Always Greener’

(Anisur Rahman/Unsplash)

I don’t know about you, but for me, ‘The grass is always greener” has helped me navigate through many a shaky moment. Whether it be wanting what others have or wanting something that just generally seems better, in the end, this proverb has proven a sound guide.

If we reflect back on life and the lives of people we know, we find that “the grass is greener” is a pervasive trap that it is wise to be on the lookout for. The adage can help guide everything from marriage to career to homeownership decisions.

How did we get the saying, “The grass is always greener on the other side?” To whom do we owe our thanks? And what circumstances did it originally derive from?

It turns out, the specific saying is decidedly American and was popularized as recently as 1924, yet it has roots that trace back over 2,000 years.

An American Song

The 1924 American appearance of the phrase was in a delightful song featuring banter between husband and wife, which goes, in part, as follows. The lyrics illustrate the meaning of today’s proverb so well, and, despite its playful nature, the song really prompts self-reflection.

The Grass Is Always Greener in the Other Fellow’s Yard (1924)

Raymond B. Egan, lyrics Richard A. Whiting, music

Why do you wash your windows said Misses Haggerty So I can watch the neighbors said Misses Hennessy They have a new piano, She has a hat I like Lots better things than I have so I took it up with Mike The language that he used might seem amiss Translated from profane it goes like this

Sure the Grass is always greener in the other fellow’s yard And the little row we have to hoe Seems mighty hard You loved our little roadster Till O’Day’s got their sedan And now you call our roadster just an old tomato can

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… If we all could wear green glasses then it wouldn’t be so hard Just to see how green the grass is in our own back yard

… You always see the fine clothes Maggie’s hangin’ on her back And never see the mortgage that is hangin’ on their shack

…While you love to knock my cooking and to praise each girl you see Does it dawn on you there’s husbands who rave over me If you’d only wear green glasses then it wouldn’t be so hard Just to see how green the grass is in our own back yard

(You can find a recording of this online if you look up: Billy Jones sings “The Grass Is Always Greener (In the Other Fellow’s Yard)” 1924. A fun throwback to an earlier era.)

Where did the “grass is greener” metaphor come from, exactly? It likely originates from the following agricultural phenomenon: grazing animals tend to poke their heads through border fences and eat the grass on the other side, in the neighboring field, or tend to escape through fences to reach adjacent pastures in search of new grass to eat.

Surely this animal behavior had been witnessed so many times that thoughtful people reflected on what it could mean for human beings, thus giving rise to the saying, “The grass is always greener on the other side.”

The Sweetest Apples in England

England gave rise to a very similar sentiment to our American version, yet far earlier. In 1640, George Herbert compiled a book of nearly 1,200 sayings, called “Jacula Prudentum” (or “Darts of the Wise”) and it contained the following: “The apples on the other side of the wall are the sweetest.”

Over in Scotland, a similar saying arose not long afterward (in 1678), which was “The fairest apple hangs on the highest bough.”

Yet this type of saying so bespeaks of the human condition, that it has been with the Western world for far longer, in Latin. There are many variations on it, about pastures, harvests, and more.

In 2 A.D., Roman poet Ovid wrote “Ars Amatoria” (“The Art of Love”), where it says: “The harvest is always richer in another man’s field.”

One could argue that the saying we have today thus traces back over two millennia.

Wisdom of the Ages

It must be a natural human tendency to want what others have, what’s out of reach, or perhaps off limits. While we all have goodness within, there are of course sinful tendencies too, which “The grass is always greener” can help us keep in check. Eve obviously exemplified this desire for the forbidden in the Garden of Eden, so the problem, or concept, seems to go back as far as the beginning of creation of human beings.

How to keep desires in check is a massive subject, but, personally speaking, staying spiritually grounded, and also generally balanced, seem to be keys for me. Staying connected to higher things, and remembering both who gave us our lives, as well as what a life well-lived looks like, will surely help us block out the “noise” of desire around us.

The world is designed to test us, and to take us away from higher things. But in truth, the grass isn’t always greener. Just maybe, what we have right now is actually the greenest of all.