Video Captures Moment When Deaf Mother With Dementia Recognizes Daughter

Video Captures Moment When Deaf Mother With Dementia Recognizes Daughter
Screenshot of the viral video shared by MJ Grant on her Facebook. (MJ Grant/Facebook)
Venus Upadhayaya
2/23/2019
Updated:
2/23/2019

People who have parents with dementia understand how hard it is to live and take care of those struggling to remember things. A video on Facebook captures a sweet moment when a deaf 76-year-old mother with dementia recognizes her daughter.

The emotional video was taken by MJ Grant, who captured herself having a conversation with her mother in a car in Maine. She captioned the video “Dementia can be beautiful” and shared it on Facebook.

Grant’s parents are deaf and her mother, Carmen, has dementia.

The video begins with Carmen not knowing who Grant is. “Where’s MJ?” Grant asks her mother who’s dressed in a red sweater.

Carmen doesn’t remember where MJ is and replies that she doesn’t know when she last met her.

“I saw her a long time ago … Christmas. I forget,” Carmen replies.

Grant is patient and amicable and tries again. “Where is MJ right now?” she asks.

“Maybe traveling? Have you met her?” Carmen says.

To help her mother, Grant mentions her father’s name. “Manley is my father,” she says.

Carmen starts to recollect and slowly realizes that Grant is her daughter. “Did I give birth to you?” she asks Grant.

Grant sweetly nods and smiles. Carmen repeats the question, raises her hands to her face in disbelief and gives Grant a hug.

“I’m so surprised. I’m your mother? And I have another one?” she says.

Grant nods and Carmen says, “Oh yes, it’s the two of you.”

After the video became viral, Grant expressed her thanks to the viewers and to the media in various posts on Facebook.

“My beautiful mama has touched the world in ways I cannot comprehend. Feelings run so deep for me these days and my heart continues to expand greater than I could have imagined. Thank you.

“A Chilean journalist just sent me the Spanish version of our video with Spanish subtitles,” she said.

In another post, Grant shared: “The past month has been nothing short of amazing ... thank you to everyone who has liked, shared, commented, sent heartfelt messages sharing your own personal stories and sending love throughout the world. Keep spreading the love, light, and kindness. I love you all.”

In the video, Grant shares that she learned sign language from her mother Carmen. In another video posted on Facebook, Grant thanks everyone in sign language. “From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for all your love and support in sharing our ‘Dementia can be beautiful’ video and for sharing yourselves with us. I feel honored and eternally grateful,” she said.

Grant got long and touching replies to her videos. “Oh my, I am sitting here in tears. Just retired yesterday after 35 blessed years working with Deaf, Deaf-Blind, Hard of Hearing. Saw this beautiful clip of you and sweet Mommy. My Daddy (hearing) had dementia 2 years associated with Parkinson’s. Precious precious and tough journey. So much love, thank you for letting us walk with you,” said Facebook user, Pamela Horne Poretti.

Another user, Alice Anderson said: “This is so beautiful. My mama had forgotten me and in the last days before she passed she suddenly became clear and said, ”I remember you. I will always remember you.“ It was one of the last things she said to me. Thanks for sharing this beautiful moment. Sending you all the love.”

Grant has also shared a video in sign language with her dad who’s also deaf. She captioned the video: “Super bowl predictions with Dad. Will @tombrady pull another one off???”

Watch another one of her sweet videos with Carmen here:

Venus Upadhayaya reports on India, China and the Global South. Her traditional area of expertise is in Indian and South Asian geopolitics. Community media, sustainable development, and leadership remain her other areas of interest.
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