Here is a story from an experience I had some time ago.
Before meeting with a new customer I was told that “this guy is pretty cynical and will only give you a few minutes.” Understandably apprehensive, I asked the customer, “How did you get started in this business?” He related the story of his first day on a shipyard in Scotland.
He was very young and scared to death. They issued him a “tin cup” for his tea break, and he observed others attaching the cup to a metal pole and holding it over hot coals. A man walked up and said, “Need help, boy?” and proceeded to put the lad’s cup on top of the coals. The boy’s eyes widened as he saw his cup disappear in the flames.
“From that point on, I knew I had to take care of myself,” the customer said.
What an opportunity! By asking a simple question around a childhood incident, we gained valuable insight into this man’s background and established the foundation for our relationship by listening. He became a valued customer.
A Simple Truth
By becoming genuinely interested in others, you can gain more friends in a week than you can in a year of trying to get others interested in you. The value of this experience lies in the discipline of listening first–then giving information.
For technically trained people, this is unnatural. We build our technical reputations on telling—or giving information. For most of us, listening first is a paradigm shift.
You may not have the luxury of establishing this in-depth relationship with every person, but you can connect with others at a higher level. The impact this has on others filters to your valued customers (internal and external).
