After the U.S. Supreme Court draft decision to overturn Roe v. Wade was leaked, abortion has become a topic many people are thinking about, but generally from the would-be mother’s perspective, with the effects on the would-be father largely being ignored.
But Greg Mayo, a public speaker and member of the men’s task force with an organization called Support After Abortion, is trying to change that. He is the author of “Almost Daddy,” a novel, and later a recovery guide (by the same name) for men about how to heal after an abortion.
Mayo said that after widely sharing his story of abortion loss and recovery, more and more men have been empowered to break their silence and acknowledge their own grief and loss.
“This thing, there’s a groundswell under it, there’s more and more guys that are being heard, that are finding out that healing is possible, that are finding out that their voices actually mattered and that their loss is valid,” Mayo added.
Mayo said he initially wrote his novel “Almost Daddy” because he felt he had to get the story “out of me,” after which he was asked to write a guide for healing. Most recently, he has been encouraged by thousands to lead classes via webinars to help men on their journey to healing after an abortion.
“We’ve put together this recovery guide. We’re putting together a webinar series to train small group leaders [on] how to run small groups to help men through this process.”
He was tormented for over a decade from the abortion his girlfriend had when they were in high school, which included feelings of anxiety, shame, depression, and confusion.
“So I did what men do, I put it in a little box on the shelf and stuffed it away and tried not to deal with it. The unfortunate part is when we do that, it comes out some other way, that pressure valve has to be released, and that’s what the acting out behaviors were about.”
He said he engaged in risk-taking activities like bungee jumping, whitewater rafting, and cliff diving; but others may go more toward drugs and alcohol to deal with these difficult emotions.
His abortion recovery model resembles the 12-step program used by Alcoholics Anonymous because Mayo believes the most effective way for men to deal with this issue is to talk to other men who have experienced a similar loss.
“Men will respond 100 times out of a 100 to an authentic man that shares a story they can relate to. So if you share with truth [and] authenticity: ‘look, this is what happened, this is how much it hurt, this is what I did about it.’ That will draw a man in and that’s what we’re seeing,” he said.
