While lunching recently with an old friend, he reminded me of a time when Democrats and Republicans could engage in a casual conversation about politics, and the chat would remain civil, cordial, and respectful. My pal mentioned his yearning to return to those days, and I could sense that he was eager and enthusiastic to hear my cogent political thoughts, opinions, and analyses—so long as they were all aligned entirely with his.
While scarfing down a plate of chicken and rice, I couldn’t squeeze a word in as my chum relentlessly badgered his lunch companion. I received more jabs than a senior citizen lining up in a long series of free “vaccinations” at the local pharmacy. Oddly, my friend’s guy is president, but he spent a great deal of time name-calling, insulting, berating, and tearing down the party of former President Ronald Reagan. Now Donald Trump is no Reagan, but look closely and you might see some resemblance. You’ll need to look closer than that. As lunch continued, the attacks on former President Trump became more vicious, and after a few minutes, I wanted to tap out. I checked my watch and did the math—my turn to speak, I’m sure, was swiftly approaching.
My buddy’s hostility reminded me of that warm autumn evening during a Trump-Biden debate when Joe Biden quipped, “You’re the worst president America has ever had.” To be fair, there may have been a time or two in the past where 45 said something unsavory about one or three of his foes. In any event, all is fair in love, war, and politics. Let the conversation meander on, and in time, I’ll be able to state my case in our rapidly dissolving “civil” discussion.
For now, it’s still my old friend’s floor, and he went on to reference Hillary Clinton’s “basket of deplorables” and a sundry list of miscellaneous idiots who are ready to vote for former President Trump in the quickly approaching, neck-and-neck election. My compadre is convinced that the delightful duo of Biden-Harris are deserving of four more years at the helm, and he cited the most recent jobs report which indicates the country added just over 300,000 jobs in the month of March. One jobs report does not a second-term president make, I thought. But at the risk of getting into a heated debate at a small restaurant packed with EV-driving patrons wearing UC Berkeley ball caps, I decided it best to hold my tongue. My moment to speak up and plead my case must only be seconds away.
I was mentally preparing to defend the party, the man, the mission, and the final aim and reason for the re-election of 45. But I would be denied the lunch pulpit that day. My comrade’s wrath would dismantle our friendship if I wasn’t on board with reelecting 46 along with the enticing notion of Vice President Kamala Harris becoming 47 somewhere between 12 minutes into and midway through President Biden’s second term.
Sticking with what could devolve into a Harris administration, it was made abundantly clear to me that my friend believes even a Harris Presidency would be superior to a Trump Presidency. But he was unable to reference anything making her a prime choice to be our nation’s future Commander in Chief. “Harris would make a fine president,” he said. So would Jimmy Carter, I thought, but right now, he’s not wholly up to the task.
Kamala Harris for President—let me have a think on that. She has never actively served in the military, has a limited background in national or global politics, and while she’s the Vice President, she has no substantial, credible background in being a world leader. Think Dan Quayle, but better coiffed and perhaps a superior speller (remember the “potatoe” incident?). In Veep’s defense, however, I’ve heard her say on a variety of occasions that she’s the “first this” or the “first that,” and I think it had something to do with race or gender. I wasn’t really paying attention because, like you, I’m less concerned with who’s first and more dialed into who’s best. A momentary lull in the conversation suggested that my time to politely chime in was coming up in 3, 2, 1 ... false alarm.
You should know that my lunch partner is a real good guy, a successful businessman, and by all accounts, even a snappy dresser. But read the headlines, man!
During this president’s tenure, we’ve been reduced to a world which dangles precariously on the precipice of WWIII with the West facing constant threats from Russia, China, and other global ne'er do wells. Iran is “this close” to nuclear weapons capability, North Korea is abundantly and increasingly hostile, and two active wars rage right now on this president’s watch. Strangely, none of this came up during lunch, and I’m just getting started.
The catastrophe at the border is inexcusable, a national threat that each of us should be enormously concerned about and an entirely fixable crisis. Admittedly, I have memory lapses from time to time, but I recall a president in the not-too-distant past who attempted to both address and repair border issues. Li'l help?
Here in California, gas is about $5.45 per gallon and the summer blend switch means prices will continue to climb. Housing and energy costs are untenable, buying groceries will soon require a credit check, the homeless crisis feels dystopian, the markets are in flux, and crime is uncontrollable. If the buck stops at the resolute desk in President Biden’s Oval Office, you wouldn’t know it from my dining companion, as these “barely worth mentioning” topics were never introduced into our dialogue (monologue).
This is not an infomercial, but wait—there’s more! There really IS more, but we’re running out of space.
Lunch is over, the check is paid, the table cleared and now, the review. The vittles were marginal, the service was acceptable, the location hard to get to. And dining with my amigo? Dining with this guy was like having my impacted wisdom teeth extracted—again and without anesthesia by a second-year dental student using never sanitized, rusty dental tools. Sometimes, I exaggerate—this is not one of those times.
I never did get a chance to voice my “wrong” opinion during lunch, and for the life of me, I’ve never heard anybody else say that Vice President Harris would make a fine president. That’s like claiming a leading sumo wrestler would be a prime candidate to become a winning jockey at the Kentucky Derby.
A choice between former President Trump and President Biden is a complicated choice indeed and for myriad reasons. Neither party is offering up a top-tier prize, but as election day draws nearer, I’m drawn to something Reagan said as he prepared to leave office at the conclusion of his second term.
“We made the city stronger. We made the city freer. And we left her in good hands.”
Could President Biden make this claim were his term in office coming to an end next week? No, he couldn’t. Not even while squinting during his seventh attempt at reading the message scrolling down the official White House teleprompter for playback at 9:00 pm, eastern. Take 8.
