If you ever find yourself searching within for the person you used to be—for that authentic part of yourself with dreams and passions, curiosities and innocence—you may want to look back to the fifth grade.
I’ve spent some time this year getting reacquainted with the fifth grade, and it seems this is a pivotal time for a person’s sense of self.
This is the year, my anecdotal evidence suggests, when fitting in becomes more important than being yourself; that gossip flourishes and bonds of trust are broken; that what’s cool is narrowly defined and pursued at all costs; that masks are constructed; that the need to protect oneself from ridicule is paramount; and that truth is buried underneath the latest trends, layers of protection, and the deep desire to be accepted.
Until the fifth grade, these 10- and 11-year-olds were a diverse group of individuals with varying interests, talents, quirks, and personalities. Now it is these differentiating characteristics that are being muted in the name of sheer conformity.
It seems that in the fifth grade, the most rebellious act is to be yourself.
Many adults can understand that somewhere along the way this happens—that fitting in is given such a high priority, one is willing to completely lose sight of oneself to achieve it. It’s not until later in life that many look up and realize they’ve drifted off their path. They’re lost and they need to dig through the protective layers to find themselves again.
