I’m Dating a Wildebeest!

I’m Dating a Wildebeest!
Katherine Smith

Dear Kathy,

     I am so cried out that I don’t have any tears left. Let me start at the beginning. I was diagnosed with sleep apnea two years ago and I have to sleep with a face mask that provides me with a steady flow of oxygen or I wake up exhausted and nauseous.

     My boyfriend and I have been together for almost four years and he was very supportive while I was going to doctors’ appointments and the sleep clinic trying to figure out why I was exhausted all the time. When I finally got my diagnosis of sleep apnea and started sleeping with my face mask, I felt self-conscious about how I looked.

     He said that I was beautiful no matter what. All he cared about was my health. I believed him. Last night we got into a nasty fight because despite the fact that we have been engaged for three years he refuses to talk about setting a wedding date. He said the most vicious things to me, including calling me a “wildebeest” because of how I look with the facemask on at night.

     I am so hurt and offended that I don’t know if I can ever forgive him. I feel like a fool for ever trusting him to begin with. I’ve invested so much of my life in this relationship, though, that I don’t want to just end things over one fight. I really trust your opinion. What do you think I should do?

Hurt and Confused,


Dear Sharon,

     Dump his behind. You deserve better. Don’t invest one more second of your life on this so-called “relationship.” Please drop me an e-mail when you’ve replaced this loser with someone worthy of your affections.

All my best,





is a licensed marriage and family therapist as well as a gifted divorce mediator in NYC. She is a former high school English teacher and college counselor with a passion for enhancing the lives of others. Additionally, Katherine has extensive training in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples, family systems, and group therapy. Readers can contact her at [email protected].
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