Sometimes we feel run down. When that happens it is time to take a step back and recharge. (Photos.com)
Running on Maximum
I had been tirelessly running my business, MyHeartDances, for six years. When I started MyHeartDances, I truly put my whole heart into it. I cared about the vision and I cared deeply about the people I worked with. I even stopped going to dance classes (the main reason I moved to New York City eight years ago) in order to have the time and finances available to make my services available to people on a full time basis.
I was confident that one day I'd get back to these other aspects of my life and be able to enjoy former pleasures, but each year seemed to add more work than the year before. At the time, this was okay because I was driven by passion. There wasn't anything in the world I'd rather be doing.
Things Are Looking Good
Finally, last summer things began to settle. Clients were hearing about my services through my newsletter, friends, and word of mouth, and I was able to do less work in marketing—my least favorite part of business. I was also feeling great about the successes clients were experiencing. It seemed like I was on my way to seeing MyHeartDances become what I always hoped it would be.
And then the economic crisis happened in September. I probably lost half of my business and though many people stayed in touch, no one was signing up for groups, classes, or workshops, and private clients were setting up fewer and fewer appointments. After all of my hard work, I felt like MyHeartDances had reverted back to year one.
I had enough energy to take me through the end of the year, but as we entered 2009, I found my tank very low on fuel. I puttered through the next few months until I came to what seemed like a complete stop. My energy was gone. I never knew what that felt like before. I had creative ideas to be excited about, but my motivation to see it through was nonexistent. It was rather shocking actually. I am a very driven person. When I fall and scrape my knees, I'm up before anyone else knows what happened. I see where I want to go, and I keep going.
No More Energy
I never imagined that I would be in a place where I felt drained. Have you been there? There was nothing left to do but to begin nurturing me. I never knew that growing a business could take this much out of me. I had set my expectations too high, and now I had to make time for me, the “me” that didn't include anything to do with the business.
Since summer began I have been spending my time refilling my tank. I have put most projects on the back burner and l am simply doing things I love to do. I haven't done these things in a very long time. I am indulging in books for pleasure (as opposed to for academia or business). I am taking a series of dance classes at my favorite dance studio. I'm curling up for guiltless naps in the afternoon. And maybe most importantly, I am taking time for my spiritual life.
Rx: Rest and Play
I think that when we are burned out, the only thing we can do is allow ourselves rest. The prescription is to remember the things that bring us joy and then to go out and enjoy them. We have to let go and give ourselves permission to play, time and room to think about how we are growing, how our values are changing, and whether we need to make any adjustments on the road we are walking down.
I share my experience with you because one of my biggest hopes for my work has always been that it would help people feel less alone themselves. There are so many things we go through in life that we don't talk about, don't accept, or that we push away and try to turn it into something it's not. I think we need to know that other people go through the experiences that we go through. We need that validation and affirmation. It helps us to feel connected to each other and to move forward in a healthy way.
A Gift
Feeling burned out is turning out to be a great blessing for me. I never thought I'd say that, but I'm actually having a lot of fun. Once I finally let go and allowed myself to embrace it, my body, mind, and soul are finding rest and joy. I have even begun to have creative bursts of energy that I am again following through on. I'm thankful for that! Sometimes it's good to stop trying so hard to get where we are going and just be.
Melissa King is a life and wellness coach in New York City. She works with women on weight loss, better success in dating, and career satisfaction. Her Web site is www.myheartdances.com Contact her at melissa@myheartdances.com
