She recently came to me for resources to help with the side effects she was experiencing, and she confided in me about her newfound fear of sharing her choice with "nature-loving" people like me. I could understand why, and this made me sad. Individuals suffering from serious illness must deal with the effects of their disease as well as the stress of making choices about how to treat the disease, often from options that all have uncertain outcomes. The last thing one, who is going through this, needs is judgment about their choices on how they will take care of themselves. Sadly, judgmental attitudes often come from those in the alternative health community.
The Perfect Answer
We don't have all of the answers to perfect health. It's unlikely that we ever will. Some things are easy. Our body has the natural ability to heal certain diseases and injuries without much trouble at all. Other illnesses have been shown to have high success rates when treated with specific therapies—some through alternative/traditional medicine and others through western medicine. But there are some diseases that we still have a lot of questions about. With these conditions, doctors often give us options and tell us that the outcome is hard to predict. We do our best to inform ourselves and then we make the decision that seems best for us at that moment in time.
Many of us will explore traditional and western alternatives when confronted with disease. There is always a risk when we are faced with a choice like this. No matter how much we want to be in control, we just aren't. We have to do the best we can to honor our experience, knowledge, and intuition, and then just move forward and let go.
Judgments
What makes me saddest about the judgments that my friend encountered is that her experience is not an isolated case. Sometimes the "pro-natural health" community can be very judgmental and dogmatic, but as advocates for natural therapies and health, I think our first duty is to make the people in our lives feel supported. I expect that individuals who overcome disease are much more likely to do so, no matter what treatment they choose to undergo, if they feel loved and supported by the people who surround them. When our friends have faith in what we are choosing to do, somehow it increases our own ability to expect a positive outcome—and this has a direct affect on our health and our bodies.
I write this article today because I want to encourage those of you who have to make difficult choices like this. People in the "pro-natural health" community are afraid of serious illness just like the rest of us. This often leads to controlling behaviors in some individuals who have invested themselves in certain lifestyles. We get similar reactions from individuals who find their comfort solely in western medicine. It's so important to take pushy assertions with a grain of salt.
Individual Values
Most of us agree that being healthy means that you are mentally lucid, free of pain, and have energy to live your daily life. But when we are confronted with illness, the answer to what is healthiest in that given moment is not so easily answered. That is when what we value about health comes into play. We may be faced with the choice between taking a medication that has bad side effects or an alternative therapy that has not been studied and where the only evidence for its effectiveness comes from testimonies of those who have tried it before. At this point an individual may have to decide between handling the side effects of medication or prolonged anxiety about whether an alternative treatment might work. For some, there is no anxiety, and the answer is easy. For others, they'd rather take the side effects than worry about the unknown.
Sometimes the choice to follow the western medical route is the right choice for a person at a given time. We each have to weigh the information given to us and choose what is best based on our individual needs. If one chooses western medicine, they haven't betrayed the alternative health movement. Sometimes we have to pick and choose. Health does not require loyalty to one type of modality. I encourage you to move forward and know that, yes, there is risk in choices, but you must make a choice, so do your best to research, ask questions, and advocate for yourself, and then bring people around you who support you and proceed on your journey!
Melissa King is a life and wellness coach in New York City. She works with women on weight loss, better success in dating, and career satisfaction. Her Web site is myheartdances.com.Contact her at melissa@myheartdances.com.
